Tuesday, January 29, 2008


the daughter came home from traveling around Eastern Europe and Israel, safe and sound. She was in airplanes, buses, trains, autos, subways, and who knows what. shortly after taking her to the airport yet again, i got stuck 2 blocks from my home, and then again at the base of my driveway. it amuses me that my children have traveled far and wide--Europe, Asia, the Middle East, and i can't even drive my car in my hometown. perhaps its time to look seriously at public transportation.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Ether or ?

Amazing that i could still remember what ether smelled like 45 years later. I recall the words spoken, the foul rubbery odour of the black mask lowered over my breathing orifices, and the feeling of panic induced by these. This time the mask was clear plastic, the smell was better, and words designed to comfort and hasten the process. Age had little to do with it.....i still felt 7 yrs old.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

only one of four tyres was flat!

I had a flat tyre today. and two meetings to attend. and an angry disappearing daughter with a crisis. and a referral to special ed. and a party for a twenty-one yr old. sometimes i hate being a grownup, i want someone else to fix my flat, attend my meetings, take my notes, do my shopping. Sitting around with friends my age, listening to handsome young men in their twenties, watching a youngster relate to adults, made me glad to be myself. It is fun to watch children mature, amusing to listen to their ideas and insights. They don't all know what they are doing, but they are out living, learning, working, and being. I love being human, i love being part of the drama of life. Even when life inhales vigourously.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

i don't hate much of anything

several days ago i googled some word and ended up looking at a blog entitled "I Hate Everything". It was caustic and amusing and i found small shards of envy and admiration poking at my heart. I thought, "i could do something similar, for i love to be sarcastic and witty". When i began to create a blog, however, i discovered I couldn't be negative. So many words, ideas, facial expressions, actions, and etc. that are negative occur constantly in this world. i realized I needed to grow up and focus, as i did when a child, on those pieces of life which make living bearable. Sometimes these might be a catalyst for gratitude that my life is easier than another's, sometimes simply reminders that this IS a wonderful world. I do not want to JUST rant, even intelligently.

Smiles last forever

about 10 years ago i worked in a local high school for a short time with young adults who had developmental disabilities. One young man diagnosed with cerebral palsy stood in a prone stand during the hour I was in his room. He had blue eyes that lit up when he laughed, loved to play jokes or be teased, and enlivened every moment i spent in a difficult room. leaving work today a man zipped up to the school in a racy wheelchair. I spoke to him and made him laugh then went to my car. 75 feet away, i realized he was the young man i'd known before. Speech is not easy for him, so when i asked his name he whipped up a small red and yellow magnadoodle where KC was written. I reminisced and told him how much his laughter had helped my days. His eyes crinkled with delight. Connexions, positive emotional joys, these are what make us human, and make being human worthwhile.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

"I saw a dead body last night."

said one of my second grade students this morning. No wonder she was having trouble with math! Children amaze me with their survivalist attitudes. And i was worried and upset over a rude comment someone had made about me.....